Problems
Welcome to Breastfeeding Experiences!
No one ever said breastfeeding was easy. Problems that can arise are numerous, ranging from the physical (cracked nipples, engorgement, mastitis, a poor latch) to the psychological (no let down, a fear of not producing enough milk). All too often, women turn to the bottle in despair.
What problems have you had while breastfeeding? Did you overcome them, or did you turn to formula feeding? Please use this form to share your story.
Problems
Name: Jenifer
Title: My Story
Story: This will be a really long story, it's for those that want to breastfeed AND those that want to bottle feed!
Child 1: I was going to have a natural childbirth (that ended in an emergency C-Section with me under general anesthesia and no memory of the birth or the next 4 hours). Of course I was also going to breastfeed. My son had a jaw misalignment and could not latch, they brought in several consultants and I even had a La Leche League consultant come in, they all agreed pumping was my only option.
So, I rented a hospital grade pump (spent 7 days in the hospital with nurses discouraging me) and pumped. At first I got maybe 1/2 ounce from both sides, but grew hopeful as a few days went by and I got 3 ounces. During this time we "had" to supplement with formula. I finally got home and spent hours naked, doing skin to skin contact hoping he would latch only to be frustrated and bawling as he screamed at my nipple as though it were some demon out for his blood. I pumped and pumped, at first I got a steady 3 ounces, then 2, then 1 ... you get the idea. It was official, I had become a formula feeding mom.
I could not give birth, I could not sustain his life with my milk ... what kind of mother could I ever hope to be? Postpartum Psychosis and depression set in, and as I shook the powder and water concoction I cried and cried. My family pushed me to keep pumping my empty sore breasts and to get no end result, perfect strangers made snide comments as I publicly mixed and fed my newborn formula and his father made me feel utterly worthless for being upset at all (so we separated ultimately). It was official, the world had ruled me a loser and unfit (*a C-Section and formula, geeze*).
I pulled myself together, reminded myself "they" didn't know my story or situation and I was finished being depressed and feeling guilty, no more looking at breastfeeding mothers with longing and jealousy. Screw "them" all, I used formula and I was no longer ashamed. And if you choose to do so, hold your head high, as long as WHATEVER you do is for the right reasons....
THEN Child 2: My husband begged me to try breastfeeding again, I said no way, I am not setting myself up for the same depression, he was not in my life and had not seen. Then I had the most WONDERFUL, FANTASTIC nurse and it was her that made it happen. She listened to my first experience and when my second son came out, at first he refused. She placed him to my breast and relaxed me (distracted me) and the next thing I knew ... he was latched perfectly and eating away.
It was wonderful, and yes, painful, but wonderful. At 7pm the new round of nurses came in, at 9ish they weighed him and told us we made need to use formula. My wonderful husband refused and encouraged me. At midnight, they said he had went from 7lbs 9oz at birth to 6lbs 5oz and if we didn't give him a bottle of formula they would have to intervene. I asked them to call the ped. and they did. He said it was fine, AND NORMAL, but the nurses brought in a bottle and talked my husband into it. He agreed. Luckily, as I cried and cried and screamed in anger he refused to allow the bottle into his mouth. He took a small taste and literally lip-locked.
That morning the ped came in, said he was fine and we started breastfeeding. At the two week check up he had still not reached his birth weight and was diagnosed with severe reflux. So, we switched to a bottle (and breast still) to add cereal, I started pumping to increase production (went up to being able to pump 8-10 ounces at a time), and we also discovered I was an "under-producer". So, I pumped religiously and became an over-producer, we used reflux meds, and I would pump and let the bottle separate in the fridge, after it separated we scraped the milk fat off the top and fed it to him. I got to choose when he would wean from my milk! And surprisingly (at 2 weeks) we had no bottle/breast issues, he took to both as long as my milk was part of the equation. By the time he was weaned he was huge, even now at 18 months old he is 28 pounds!
Child 3: He latched immediately. No help needed, his mouth snatched on as he was being place in my arms! He refuses a pacifier or bottle! He is 12 weeks and almost 14 pounds!
The truth is that when I used formula there was negative judgment and comments. When I breastfed my second there were people and other family members that thought it was obscene and dirty, not to mention the stares in public although I was fully draped. And now there are still many stares and many judgments, but I have to do what I FEEL is right. I feel my milk is the best, not a cow's and not a stranger's, mine.
The saliva from my son's mouth actually causes chemical reactions that adjust the milk FOR HIM alone, how much better can anything be when it's self-adjusting and custom processed? Not to mention, for ME, it keeps me from experiencing any PPD. I am for whatever each person decides for their family and child because I have been on both extremes and in the gray area as well.
As long as your decision is based only on what is best for your child I support it! No, I don't like being stared at because some uptight freak is uncomfortable with my decision, but until I decide something else is better for my family, I refuse to let anyone interfere with my son's feeding!
I don't like to watch people chew with an open mouth, but it isn't for me to dictate, and my son is entitled to eat just like everyone else.
For those that say pooping is natural as well but I wouldn't want them to show me, I say, go ahead, but only if I can change my son's diaper on your table!
Name: Perdita
Title: My Breastfeeding Experience
Story: I thought I'd tell you about my breastfeeding experience. I fed my son Liam in the delivery room about an hour after he was born and it was a bit uncomfortable but the midwife said he was on perfectly so I fed him for about 20 mins. I was then woken about 6.30am as they like them to feed again 6 hours after delivery and they helped me get him postioned and I then fed him again about 12.30pm before I was transferred to my local hospital. It all went downhill from there.
I arrived about 2.30pm and the midwife took me to my bed, (I was the only one in there). She basically asked why I was in there when this was baby number four! I told her that I hadn't breastfed before and didn't have a clue and wanted some help. I did not see another midwife until 6.45am the next day! The auxillary staff made me tea but it wasn't them I needed. I carried on feeding Liam as and when by about 11.30pm it felt like I had been feeding him forever! He started about 7pm, spent an hour on one side, stopped for about 20 mins and then spent an hour on ther other. When I was feeding him at 11.30pm I stopped and tried to find a midwife because I was crying so much with the pain! There was no-one to be seen, the office was in darkness and all that was on was some lights down the end of the corridoor and I didn't like to go out there so I just went back to my bed and carried on feeding and crying!
I phoned my husband at 8am and told him to come and get me at 10am instead of 2pm. I was in such a state by this time, I was crying on the phone to him and then the auxillary nurses. One of them got the midwife and she had a look and said no wonder you are sore, your nipples are bleeding. She told me to put cream on the breast pad after each feed and to carry on (again no help with postioning). I went home and fed him to that evening but then I had to stop.
I spoke to the midwife when they came round for the first day but they basically said it was ok to stop and the midwife that came round on day 5 said the same. But I didn't want to stop, all I wanted was a bit of help and support but I didn't get any (except in the big hospital, even though they were so busy, nothing was ever too much trouble). When I bottle fed the others I was made to feel guilty but this time I wanted the help and didn't get it! I really enjoyed doing it and that was the hardest thing for me, especially when I had to sit there and give him a bottle. I know it's important that we are both happy but I didn't feel it.
Name: Anne
Title: GERD/Reflux and Nursing/TED
Story: When I first found out I was pregnant, I knew I wanted to nurse my baby. I was all prepared, read all the book, got my boppy, the whole nine yards.
My baby was born and I nursed him. Then, things started to go strange. He wanted to eat ALL the time. When he wasn't eating, he was screaming. I had no idea what I was doing wrong. I tried eliminating things from my diet. I then had a very bad LC tell me that my son could allergic to my milk!
I started giving him formula at the request of his pediatrician and he still screamed. By this time, my supply was greatly diminished. Three months later, we learned about reflux. It turns out my little dude was constantly nursing or screaming due to the pain. After being put on the proper medication, he was fine. After much work and several months, I was able to nurse him all but one bottle a day.
Then along came my next boy... Knowing that he may have reflux, we were aware of the signs right away and started medication. However, unlike my first boy who nursed constantly, my second had other ideas. He quit eating entirely as he related food with pain. He eventually lost over a pound and the doctors were threatening hospitalization if I didn't give him formula. I did but it did not make him gain weight. So, I pumped.
In efforts to make him gain weight, I used a supplemental feeder (a device that holds milk and you tape a thin tube to your breast). I would put the "cream" from additional pumped milk into the feeder and let him have that along with the nursing. We had to use a nipple shield because he hated the tube and refused to put it in his mouth! He is still extremely small. He's never been on the growth charts. He is still considered "failure to thrive".
Also, through out all of this, I did the TED (total elimination diet). For 6 months, I ate nothing but acid free fruits, turkey, and "no fuss" vegetables (varieties of squash). It was terrible. I craved food constantly.
Again, as he got older, I was able to add more variety to my diet. Now, he is even able to have cow milk! Currently, my second son is almost 21mths old and is still nursing. Neither he, nor I are in any rush to quit. It has been a LONG and exhausting road but I am so glad I kept going through it all.
Name: Pixie
Title: My Breastfeeding Story
Story: When my first daughter, E, was born in 2004 I had no problems with breastfeeding- well apart for sore nipples and a couple of cases of mastitis.
I had all the usual engorgement issues when my milk came in, leaking, spraying, in fact a total abundance of milk. I remember once E came off and the milk literally sprayed all over the place.
I used to leak from one side while feeding from the other and E put on loads of weight. I'll never forget the midwife commenting that I must have gold top milk.
Since I was 16 I have always suffered from Itp- a blood condition that means I'm always tired and have low resistance.
I never imagined I would have any problems breastfeeding my second child when she was born on November 1st 2007. Having said that I did have a problematic pregnancy with morning sickeness (same with E), low heamaglobin, SPD and high triple test result.
I remember having a chat with the midwife on the labour ward about donating milk and the midwife said I could donate to the local hospital. I honestly thought I'd have an abundance like last time and really wanted to donate. We did all the right things, she was delivered onto me and she fed almost straight away.
She was a fantastic baby that first day- she was born 5.08am weighing 8lb 8oz and she slept most of the day while I had 2 transfusions. At tea time we went to the post natal ward where S slept. Perfectly normal behaviour for a newborn baby. I fed her every 3 or 4 hours and we were discharged the following day. My haemoglobin was still low at 7.9 but it had been about 8 during my second trimester so I wasn't too worried.
My labour had lasted 7 hrs and I had managed it on gas and air so I felt fantastic. Empowered in fact. I had colostrum those first few days and within about 5 days the colostrum had changed to milk- I know that as I hand expressed just to check. I didn't get the fullness that I'd had first time but S was feeding well I thought and she seemed happy and content.
The midwife weighed her when she was a week old and her weight had dropped to 7lb9oz which was ok according to the midwife. The following Saturday when S was 16 days old she had lost a further 6oz and was down to 7lb3oz. This was on a Saturday and the midwife immediately said I would have to give her formula as well as breastfeeding. I was adamant that I didn't want to do that and she said she'd call again on the Monday and if she hadn't gained then I'd have to give her formula. I was to feed her every 2 hrs in the meantime.
I spent the weekend feeding, spent the whole of Sunday on the couch feeding while Ian (husband) took E to a party and generally gave me rest. On the Monday she hadn't gained. Cue comments of formula again which I said I really didn't want to do. My midwife tried to ring a lactation expert working for the NHS. I had met her before when she came to revamp the breastfeeding group I attended with E who I had fed till she was nearly 3.
She couldn't get hold of her but I remembered that there was a group locally headed by a GP. I said I'd go there that afternoon and my midwife said she'd try to speak to the GP. I went there that afternoon and the GP noticed that S had a very small tongue tie and she wanted me to see the lactation consultant . An appointment was made for me to see her the following Thursday when S was 3 weeks old.
I also rang my haematologist who assured me that there was no physiological connection between my blood condition and lack of milk.
I went and had a chat and the lactation consultant adjusted the way I was holding S and we were both hopeful that that would sort the problem. She reassured me that even if it didn't there were other things we could do culminating in a drug to increase milk production as I had commented that I never felt my milk come in properly. The tongue tie was left as she didn't think it would affect S's feeding. She gave her a thorough exam and S was able to extend her tongue properly so the lactation consultant decided to leave it for the time being.
We were being weighed on Monday and on Thursdays throughout this process with a Health Visitor coming to the house on the Monday and me going to see the lactation consultant in a clinic 30 mins drive away on a Thursday.
By the 26 November when she was nearly 4 weeks old she was 7lb71/2 oz.
Her poo wasn't as much as E's had been and her nappies weren't soaking wet like E's used to be. She also didn't posset as much as E used to.
By the Thursday- 3 days later there was no weight gain. I had been doing switch feeding, breast compressions and I had been taking 3 tablets of fenugreek 3 times a day and still no difference.
The lactation consultant suggested that I take Domperidone- 10mg 3 times a day and she also gave me a hospital breast pump on loan. The idea behind the pump was to stimulate milk production rather than collecting milk. Good job really as for the first few days I wasn't getting any milk at all. Throughout all of this process I was feeling very low and concerned about my baby. S had been seen by 2 GPs in case there was something serious the matter, we had done urine tests on S (that was fun) and I was seeing the lactation consultant every week.
My Health Visitor was very supportive and is a colleague of the lactation consultant and she facilitated me getting the domperidone that day and even took the prescription to the chemist for me- all I had to do was collect the tablets from the chemist.
Through all of this S appeared to be very healthy, she was alert, bright eyed, happy to feed, slept "normally", her skin was pink and no signs of dehydration at all.
The following Monday S was weighed and she'd only gained an ounce. I fed her while the health visitor was there and then weighed her after 10 minutes and she was an ounce heavier.
I was devastated and the health visitor told me that by now she would have put her on the bottle. Lots of well meaning people, even real die-hard pro-breastfeeding friends said to me that I couldn't blame myself for not managing to feed S if I gave her a bottle. Realistically the only people (apart from Ian) who fully supported me through all of this were the lactation consultant and Doctor from the breastfeeding clinic as well as another friend of mine who used to be a special baby care nurse and used to tell me that S looked fine- that actually was very reassuring. Both are medical people and I trust them both implicitly. If they had told me that I was harming S then of course I would give her a bottle but they didn't tell me that.
My health visitor was very good, she rings me often, weighs S when I want her weighed and has co-ordinated with the lactation consultant but there were two things that she said that upset me greatly. She called S a failure to thrive baby- I have no doubt at all that she was/is but I really didn't want to hear those words. Those words broke my heart and I don't think that the professionals should bandy those terms around with Joe Public.
I emailed the lactation consultant (I was seeing her the Thursday but was worried) and she told me to increase the domperidone to 20mg 3 times a day. I had pains in my side and was very windy. Saw the haematologist this week and he gave me 5mg folic acid twice a day and reassured me that the pain in my side wasn't my appendix.
Still no proper weight gain so I started cup feeding her formula until I saw Sharon on the Thursday- this was something we'd previously discussed and I gave her 30ml in the morning and 40ml in the evening.
On the Thursday Sharon gave me a feeding supplementer to give her the formula through. This would continue to stimulate my milk production whilst ensuring that S was getting some formula- my milk still wasn't abundant and until it was I needed to make sure that S was putting on weight. I also had a theory that perhaps she was feeding enough to sate her but not enough to give her the strength to feed and to add on the extra weight. I honestly don't know why my milk never came in properly, neither does Sharon nor my haematologist.
Her weight gain was still slow but it was gains rather than losses. The GP and lactation consultant helped me look on the positive side of things. We upped the formula to 120 ml a day and she went to hospital to have her tongue tie cut. A very quick painless procedure carried out by the wonderful Sharon.
Went in to the clinic to have S weighed the Thursday after Christmas and we had the biggest weight gain yet- 4 1/2 oz. Even though she was on annual leave Sharon had asked me to email her with the results and she told me that if there was a problem then her colleagues would ring her and she would come to the clinic to see me!!!!! That's dedication and devotion to her job for you.
Upped her formula to 150ml a day over 2 feeds and I'm still expressing and actually getting about 20ml per side now- stocking that up in the freezer. It's not as good as when I had E but it's better than it was. She was weighed again when she was 9 weeks old and she was 8 15 a gain of 6 oz from the previous week. Doctor was happy with that and says it's about average- an ounce a day with a day off on Sunday so 6 oz a week.
I know that a lot of people would have given up by now but being able to feed my baby is to me an inherent part of being a mother. She regained her birthweight at 8 weeks which isn't what is expected.
If our Trust didn't have someone as highly trained as Sharon then I would have been "forced" I think to turn to formula. All along I have said that if formula was necessary then I wouldn't hesitate in giving it to her, but I really needed to explore every avenue before abandoning breastfeeding. S's health was paramount to me and of tantamount importance and I really needed medical support to reassure me that I was doing ok. Hopefully we've turned a corner now and the weight will continue to pile on.
Met with Sharon again and I was looking forward to starting to get back to normal but had a bit of a let down. S at 10 weeks only put an ounce on in 6 days. Sharon looked at the whole month and was quite happy that she had put 1lb and 5 oz on over the month.
Wasn't really getting on with the supplementer so have started giving S her formula via a bottle- in discussion with Sharon. So she is having 90ml of formula 12 hours apart via bottle. No nipple confusion although she initially doesn't like the teat of the bottle but soon guzzles the formula. She sicks some of it back up as wind.
At my suggestion and with Sharon's agreement we have increased my domperidone to 3 tablets 3 times a day. Sharon is a bit worried that some GPs may not like to keep prescribing the domperidone. It can be bought over the counter but will be expensive at the rate I'm having to take it. The GP rang in the week and I had a good chat with her. I expressed my worries about the domperidone and she said that we would just have to arm me with info for the doctors- she was reassuring me that it wouldn't be a problem. I had nearly run out at the weekend but the doctor gave me a repeat prescription again for it.
At 11 weeks Swyn gained 3 1/2 oz . Me on Domperidone, Fenugreek and Folic acid and Swyn being supplemented with 180ml of formula a day.
We got to 14 weeks with a pound increase over 3 weeks but very much up and down. 7 1/2 oz one week, then 1 oz and then 7 1/2 oz again. The decision was made for me to slowly come off the domperidone by dropping one tablet a day for 3 days and I would eventually be down to one tablet three times a day and then we'd get Swyn weighed.
The constant weighing has been very hard. Anyway, I was down to 7 tablets a day and knew something was wrong. S wasn't pooing and I felt "empty" . So I emailed Sharon- I know from past experience that breastfed babies can go without a poo for days but S and I aren't "textbook" so I was concerned, particularly as she appeared frustrated at the breast. Sharon advised me to up the domperidone, one tablet a day and see how I got on. Anyway I'm back up to the 9 tablets a day. Sharon emailed me the paper by Jack Newman which advised dropping one tablet every 5-7 days. It could take several attempts to come off the tablets without affecting my milk supply.
Sharon has plotted her progress on a chart for me and even though she is still low weight (now on 4th centile- was on 2nd) her height and head are on the 50th centile.
We've had our ups and downs the last few weeks. I still don't really have any milk and have tried to come off the domperidone again and it affected my milk- to the point where it didn't come back as much as I'd had it before. I spoke to Sharon who said I could try another drug but that had caused PND in the past. I didn't really want to try those as I was in a fairly fragile state of mind anyway after everything I'd been through. I decided instead to drink Fennel tea and take Milk Thistle.
I also was recommended a tincture called More Milk Plus. I bought it and tried it for several weeks but it made no difference so I stopped taking it.
Some weeks are really hard, particularly when S is going through a growth spurt as she demands far more than I can produce and she gets very very frustrated and cries a lot. She also won't settle on the boob as there is nothing there.
I would love to know what has caused this but I doubt I ever will.
I am still on 8 domperidone, 9 Fenugreek a day, 3 Milk thistle a day and 2 folic acid a day and at the last weigh in 3 weeks ago S was weighing in at 12 lb 6 oz. I didn't have her weighed last week (we got down to fortnightly weigh ins) as, in discussion with Sharon we decided to hae her weighed monthly due to weight fluctuations from week to week.
There have been many times when I thought the end had come for us breastfeeding but we managed with Sharon's support to carry on. I won't pretend its been easy and there have been many tears and low times but we are nearly at 6 months.
I had really wanted to do Baby Led Weaning with her but having discussed it with Ian we don't think it'll work the same as if I was fully breastfeeding her so I shall do mix and match I think.
Name: Debbie
Title: Engorgement
Story: During my first few weeks of breastfeeding, I had really bad engorgement. I felt so ill with it, not only were my breasts really big, hot to the touch and painful, but I felt like I had the flu too. My midwife suggested several things, like wearing a looser bra, expressing milk regularly, feeding my baby more often and easing them with damp towels. It took a while to settle down, really until my baby had regulated the flow himself. It was really hard and for a while I was tempted to supplement the baby with formula. I did persevere, and now of course I'm glad that I did. At the time, though, it was another nightmare to deal with on top of the piles, painful stitches and sleepless nights. Not good!